Let’s be clear: We love our kids. We are honored to be parents, we would take a bullet for our offspring, and the best day of our life was the day they entered the universe.
And now that that’s out of the way, let’s add: Being a parent can be rough. As in, parenting is probably the hardest and most important thing that most of us will ever do. There are many days when we are pushed to the limit and many days when it’s all we can do to drag ourselves into bed at night.
It helps to vent, and that’s exactly what the Reddit /parenting subgroup decided to do this week. One mom just needed to commiserate about what she despised the most about her job as a parent and hundreds of other chimed in.
“What is one thing as a parent that you just despise dealing with,” she asked. “For me it would be picking up the couch cushions when my kids, mainly my 4yr old, strips the couch. 15 cushions, including the seats, couch backs and pillows. It DRIVES ME UP THE WALL. They are heavy and I’m sweating my the time I’m done.”
Oh yep. And then you turn around and they are all over the floor again somehow. Even if there’s not a kid in the room.
Hundreds of parents added their most despised parenting task — and we’re not going to lie — it is weirdly calming to read through them.
The number one complaint? You might have already guessed it: buying, preparing, and serving food to our children. Every. Day.
“Feeding them,” said the most upvoted answer. “Everyday, I stress about what to feed these picky eaters while also being bombarded with evidence that processed food causes cancer, disrupts endocrine function, and contributes to obesity.”
“Just as I clean the dishes from the last meal they are asking for a snack,” another adds.
“I struggle with figuring out what to feed myself EVERY DAY,” another parent laments. “How am I supposed to figure them out??”
The second most popular answer was, “Resistance to basic self care.”
The poster explained: “My 4yo screams bloody murder and thrashes EVERY TIME we wash and/or comb her hair, my 6yo must be regularly reminded ‘face first butt last’ with regards to soaping up with a washcloth, they are both rebelling against snow boots right now… Like I just want you clean, healthy, and warm. Why are you fighting me on this?!?”
Many, many parents agreed.
“My almost three year old either resists sleep, food, or going to the potty. Like, three fundamental things to existence. Whyyy,” scream-wrote one exhausted parent.
And it’s not just toddlers that still need help with very basic needs.
“My kids are a bit older (9 & 11) and showering is still an issue,” said a tween parent. “They fight me on it.”
The third most popular response? The constant contact.
“Being stalked and touched constantly by the small people I created,” one mom wrote. “I think they’re convinced I’m about to do something incredibly fun or jet off to a private island without them.”
“The touching,” someone agreed. “If I stop moving for a second my seven year old is on top of me. I’m either a chair, a climbing frame, or a stuffy, depending on his mood.”
Others had more specific, although still universally relatable, gripes about their life with kids.
“Playing pretend,” said one parent, to a lot of support. “I feel like a bad parent for saying it- I know it’s good for their little imaginations, but my child could live 24/7 in her own fantasy world and there’s only so long I can pretend to be a cat.”
“The mess,” added another. “I hate clutter but want to allow my kid independence in her own space but the state of her room gives me so much anxiety.”
“The non stop singing/chatter,” said another mom. “Never a quiet moment until sleeping.”
“Waking up early to get them ready for school,” another contributed.
“I have 3 kids and the fighting,” said one parent tired of refereeing. “It’s over the dumbest shit, and when I offer suggestions they get shot down. If I leave them to ‘work it out’ it’s just more tears from someone. Then finally I separate them and they’re ‘so sad and bored.”
“Poop,” said one parent simply. “I just can’t stand dealing with poop after the age of 2. Diapers are fine, but dealing with accidents after potty training, helping wipe for months/years, cleaning poop off the toilet seat, etc.”
“Cleaning high chairs/toddler towers/counters 8x/day,” wrote another parent. “Like, whyyyyyyyy.”
“Putting them to bed every damn night,” said another mom to many upvotes.
“The germs!”
OK so — that was a long list. But really, we swear that we actually deeply love our kids. It can just be hard — really hard — to raise humans up from babies to adults. Especially when you have to feed, bathe, and keep them safe every single day.
Hopefully just a little complaining sessions helps.
